Butterfly Child
by sourpatchsofie
Summary: Seirin had their big match against Kirisaki Daiichi where Kiyoshi Teppei injures his knee. Teppei's sister, Chouko, now has to learn to deal with the sight of her knight fallen off his white horse and with the guilt that she can't do anything to stop Hanamiya from injuring even more players. Or can she? I try and post New Chapters on Thursdays.
1. My Brother (Prologue)

Prologue – My Brother

My brother was always my protector, my rock. He always had my side and I never thought I could live with out him. When we were kids I was such a brat, and he was always a gentle child. I ended up doing a bunch of crazy things to get the attention of our grandparents, which lead to me getting scolded for hours for not thinking about my actions. But, my brother always understood why I did those things; and he held my hand through all of it.

But there comes a point, in every little sister's life, where she realizes that her older brother isn't her knight in shining armor. That he cannot and will not always be there for her. That he has his own struggles and his own battles to fight. I will admit that it took me longer than most to realize that. It wasn't until my last year of middle school that I finally woke up to reality. _My brother, Kiyoshi Teppei, wasn't actually made of iron._

 _~x~_

 _Drip. Drip._ The sound of water dropping is the only sound that I remember from that day. A leaky faucet from a hospital sink, no matter how many times I pointed it out, no one ever bothered to fix it.

The sun had been setting, casting a shadow on my brother's sleeping face. It was a beautiful orange and purple backdrop that brought some color into the white sterile room. I was thankful for that sunset, for it brought some life with it, if only for a moment.

I don't know why I remembered that sound so vividly or why that sunset left such a mark in my memories. That wasn't the first time I visited my brother in the hospital, or the last for that matter, but I always happen to remember that specific sound, sunset, and shadow.

I had been sitting in the same plastic fold up chair as any other day, analyzing the room, noticing every little thing there was to notice. Taking in the space that my brother had been staying in.

My brother, I remember staring at him for quite a while. I had never seen him like this; I had never seen him this vulnerable. This six foot four giant seemed so small to me that day. My knight was wounded, and for the first time I felt like I was the one who needed to protect him.


	2. Ignorance is a Virtue

Chapter One

Being in my last year of middle school was a fucking mess. I normally wouldn't curse, but it really was. Between entrance exams, choosing schools, and keeping up with my friends, it became really hard to handle at times.

My brother was still in the hospital when I had to make the final choice about what high school I was going to. I had narrowed it down to two: Seirin, my brother's school; and Kirisaki Daichi, my dream school. I knew what Teppei would advise me to do from the very beginning, but I wanted to get his consent anyways.

I remember thinking to myself that there was more to what my brother was saying that day than he was letting on, but I had just brushed it off at the time as nothing more than a weird feeling.

"You should do what makes you happy. Don't worry about me." He had said. I expected this response from him, but what was with the betrayal that seemed to linger at the end of his every word? If only I had known then.

"I know, but you went to Seirin so you could take care of our Grandparents. It isn't fair if I got to go to my dream school when you had to sacrifice so much."

"I made that sacrifice so you didn't have to. I just wanted to play basketball, it really didn't matter to me where," He shrugged, "Basketball is basketball no matter what school you go to, but academics aren't. You want to go to school for literature and you should go to the school that helps you pave the way for your future." My brother, in this moment, even in this hospital bed, seemed bigger than he ever was. All I could do was pout and turn away from his greatness, but I could still feel his smile on the back of my head.

Looking back at it now, I understand what this meant so much more than I did then. At the time, it just felt like he was being supportive of me, but now I realize that this was his way of letting me go and it wasn't until the morning before my first day of high school that I began to put the pieces together.

~x~

"Hey, Chouko."

"Hm?" I looked up from my book and at my brother. He was leaning on the counter by stove in his pink apron, cooking up some breakfast. I was convinced this man had no shame (and still am), but I was just glad to see him back in the house, even if he was on crutches.

"Be careful in school, okay? Don't get involved with any one who you don't think is good news."

"Aww, you worried I am gonna end up bringing home some bad boy?" I laughed, "You know you don't have to worry about that. I have got my head in the game." If only I knew the irony of this statement.

"Well no, it's just," he paused for a while, "There are some people at that school that aren't the best news and I won't be there to protect you if something happens."

"I know you are worried, but there are bad people at every where. I won't always have you there to protect me."

"Yeah I know but – "

"Why are you being so weird about this?" I snapped. I had thought that if he didn't want me going to Kirisaki he could of stopped me when he had the chance, but it never was that simple.

The tension in the room was high. The sound of sizzling followed by the occasional popping noise from the pan grease was the only sound to be heard. Teppei was the first to break the silence, "I really did not want to tell you this, but I guess you would have found out anyways." I looked at him questioningly, but waited for him to continue, "The basket ball team that messed up my leg during that game was the Kirisaki Daichi basketball team." My brother looked away from me and attended to his cooking.

"Oh," I was dumbfounded, "Why did you tell me?" I wish I hadn't asked so many stupid questions at the time.

"You wouldn't have chosen that school if you had known that."

"Of course I wouldn't!" I stood up from the table angrily, grabbed my things, and headed for the door; images of my brother with that shadow across his face flash in my mind.

Before I had walked out of the house I heard my brother call out to me, "Have a good first day." I glared back at him and left with no response.


	3. Chapter Two

Chapter Two

I don't remember much else from my first day of high school. The only thing that preoccupied my mind that day was my brother. I wish I could go back and redo that day again, but I suppose that was what the second day was for.

My second morning was drastically different from the day before. My brother's knee was really bad so he slept right through the morning. I sat alone at the kitchen table, eating cereal, staring blackly ahead. When I was done I washed the bowl and headed out of the house, quietly and mindlessly.

When I got to school I went directly to my class and sat in my desk. There was no one in the room, leaving my alone with my thoughts. _The monster that hurt my brother is under the same roof as me._ These words suffocated my mind until I was forced to get up and get some air. I wandered around the school aimlessly until I stumbled upon the library.

Walking into that library on that second day reminded me of why I was so determined to get into that school. It was huge, it was old, it was rich, and boy did I love that place. From the endless rows of bookshelves that made you dizzy to look at for too long, to the smell of dust that would trigger a sneezing fit if inhaled for too long, to the way the dim lighting casted an eerie shadow on everything it touched. This was my sanctuary.

I didn't notice at the time, but I know that the smile on my face had to be huge as I stood in the entrance in amazement. After what seemed like hours of just taking in my surroundings, I took my first step inside. The silence of the library engulfed me and all thoughts of my brother dissipated.

~x~

Thinking back to this moment, I now realize that _he_ had to have been there that day. While I was falling in love for the first time, he was experiencing an old love that renewed itself every time he opened a new book.

I must have seen him, grazed my eyes over his long black hair. But even if I had known what that man had looked like, if we had been close childhood friends, I never would have been able recognized him. The peaceful look in his eyes as they concentrated at the words in a book was something that changed him from the monster that every one knew him as, to the little boy who just craved adventure.

If only you could have owned that sense of peace instead of relying on the thoughts of another to bring it to you, I think you would have been much happier. Don't you think so too, Makoto?


	4. Chapter Three

Chapter Three

The first time I laid eyes on Hanamiya Makoto also happened to be the first time I had ever watched a basketball game. It was October and it was the season of the Pumpkin Spice Latté, and Japanese high school basketball. This meant that any one with a life was either at Starbucks or at the gym.

By this point in the year I had grown over the fact that I was going to school with the vermin that hurt my brother and even managed to make some friends. These friendships were nothing more than temporary and hardly worth mentioning, except they are needed to further the plot so I must bring them up.

Yui, Rio, and Yuna; they were sweet girls, but there really wasn't anything special about them. They were mere sheep in the herd, however at the time, I thought they were really cool and it felt great to have made friends.

"Chouko, you're going to the game after school right?" One of them had asked me, which one I don't remember.

I had no intention of going to the game, not wanting to see that mans face, but I didn't want to seem uncool or something superficial like that, "Uh, I don't know, I have a lot of home work to do." That was such a lame excuse and they knew it.

"Come on. Don't be like that. We should all go together!"

"Yeah, Chou-chan, let's go!"

"Fine." I finally gave in under the pretense that I could totally ignore the garbage that would be playing, but really I just ended up glaring at him the entire game.

~x~

It was honestly the most disgusting thing I had ever seen. The way that this team could get away with so much with out getting into any trouble, yet the other team would get fouled for the tiniest of things. The way that you could see the life getting drained out of each of the opposing players with every tick of the timer. The way that our team seemed to get livelier and livelier with each blow they made to the other team. And probably the most disgusting thing, even to this day, was how every one on our side of the stands was cheering it on. The violence brought something out of my fellow classmates that was borderline criminal.

"Kill em!"

"Break their legs!"

"Turn them into trash!"

The longer I stayed in the gym, the worse the chanting became. My brain was screaming for me to leave, but I couldn't get my body to move from my seat. My friends were just sitting there joking, gossiping, and sipping on their pumpkin spice while I sat beside them on the brink of tears.

That's when _he_ looked up into the stands. Number 4, the captain, Hanamiya Makoto. We made eye contact, our eyes lingering on each other's until the tears came falling down my face, but I didn't look away, he smirked in response and ran back to the game. With the breaking of our eye contact I fell out of my trance, wiped the tears from my face, and looked back at my friends. They were watching me.

"Hey, I saw that! Chouko has the hots for Hanamiya!"

"He was totally staring back, you've got a shot girl."

"Did you know he is also head of the disciplinary committee? He is really strict and stern but he is also really smart."

"Omg, I know! He's supposed to be one of the smartest in the school. Smart and athletic, Chouko knows how to pick em"

"I get that you're all happy, but he is also known for getting into a lot of fights, none of the guys at our school like him and all his exes say bad things about him."

"They must just be jealous. Don't say bad things about Chouko's future husband!"

I could vaguely hear these words in the background of my horror. Me and him? Were these girls crazy? Do they not see what he is doing to those poor players down there? They have to be able to, yet they still are encouraging this? I am furious.

"It's not like that at all!" Was all I could manage to say before I stormed out of the gym, just as the final buzzer rang. The final score 61-36 Kirisaki Daichi's win.

~x~

I didn't know where I was going. All the feelings that I had managed to shove away managed to come back and were blinding my senses. Even as people started to leave the building I didn't notice them, continuing in the same direction, no awareness as to what I was doing.

The only thing I could see was the loss of hope in the opposing teams face. The only thing I could hear was the chanting of the malicious crowd. The only thing I could feel was a burning anger. Seeing how _my_ team played made everything so much more real to me. I imagined my brother playing against them, how he must have felt, and a fire began to spark in me; A spark that was about to get me into a lot of trouble.

"How did this little butterfly find her way into my web?" His words had been like a brick wall that I had driven right into. I was ripped out of my own mind and shoved back into reality. All thoughts prior to this had shattered like glass right before me.

My eyes refocused on my surroundings, not knowing how I got there, or where there even was, I looked for clues as to what was happening, but all I could see was _him_. His dark hair, his pale skin, his evil eyes and repulsive grin.


	5. Chapter Four

Chapter Four

"How did this little butterfly find her way into my web?" I snapped back into reality and stared at the man before me. All the anger I had just felt seemed to have drained away and I was left standing somewhere in this building, empty.

"Hm?" The boy who had stopped me in my tracks had been standing a distance away, but he seemed to get closer and closer each second I failed to respond to his question until his face was mere centimeters away from mine. "You came here to see me, right? You are right in front of the boys locker room." His grin grew wider.

"…Oh." I responded automatically. I started looking around me and I saw a sign indicating that he was indeed telling the truth, but I still had no idea how I had gotten there. I looked back at the face in front of me and said, "I guess I must have gotten lost on the way out," almost as if I was answering myself.

I started to walk away, still stunned by the whole situation, until he called out to me, "What? You aren't going to congratulate the winning team?"

I stopped in my tracks and stood facing away from him. Everything came rushing back to me the moment his sarcastic tone found its way to my ears. All the emotions that he seemed to push out of me, he pulled right back in with even a stronger force, and I found myself laughing at the whole thing.

"What's so funny?" The man replied in a rather annoyed tone.

I turned around to face him, laughter still spilling out of my lips. Of course, out of all the places for my subconscious to take me, it took me here. To see the exact person I had 0 desire to see.

"Yo crazy bitch, what's wrong with you?"

I finally calmed myself down, tears still in my eyes from laughing and replied, "I never would have guessed that you could become even more disgusting than I originally thought, but here you are." Normally, when people get insulted they tend to get upset and defend themselves, but this boy that was right in front of me, he couldn't ask for anything more. His face had gone from a look of annoyance and confusion to a smirk that I would quickly grow accustomed to.

"Don't act all tough now, I saw you crying in the crowd earlier," he walked toward me once again, closing the gap between us, "you are scared of me and I know it, Baka."

"Who would be scared of a scrawny little basketball player like you? You obviously wouldn't have to play the way that you do if you were actually strong." I was playing tough, but in reality I knew what he did to my brother and I knew that it took strength to make that happen. I was scared shitless.

"Yeah, I might not be the tallest or the buffest player in the league, but I assure you," He paused, got up close to my ear, and whispered, "I am the strongest and I have no problem giving you a taste of what I can do." All of a sudden, I felt his arms around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I tried to push him away from me, but it all proved futile; he was completely overpowering me.

"Let go of me you freak! Or else I'll–"

"Or else you will what?" ' _Or else I'll beat the shit out of you'_ was what I was going to say, but how the hell was I supposed to do that if I couldn't even get him off of me? I felt our difference in strength, my will to fight poured out of me making my body go limp under his grasp. When ever I had been picked on or harassed my brother had been there to protect me. I relied on him so much and now he wasn't here, leaving me defenseless.

I could feel my skin go pale and Hanamiya must have noticed cause he loosened his grip on me.

"See, baka. You can't do anything to stop me. Not you and not Kiyoshi Teppei either." _Kiyoshi Teppei? My brother?_

My face shot up and I looked him in the eye, "How do you know I was his sister?" His grin grew wider at my response.

"I am head of the disciplinary committee. It's my job to know every one in our school and make sure they stay in line." I ignored the snide tone he gave me and just stared at him. This whole time he knew whom I was, how I felt about him. He knew. "What I did to your brother last Inter High was a master piece," he continued, "I heard he is still not back in school. Who would have thought that I would have been so successful? It excites me to see protégées turn into garbage with just a snap of a finger."

"You are repulsive." Is all I manage to say. The lump that was forming in my throat from holding back tears was making it hard to speak. All I could think of was my brother in the hospital. How his usual out going self was trapped in that barren room, with the leaky faucet.

"Even now, watching the girl who was so snarky just a minute ago break into an emotional mess," He tightened his grip around me once again, "is invigorating." I felt so weak in his grasp. The tears overtook me and I found myself crying into his chest, unable to push myself away from him, making me even more upset. "Now, now, don't cry. " He said mockingly.

He continued on, saying something that I can assume was intended to humiliate me but I couldn't hear any of it. All this time I felt so angry toward this man. I wanted to hurt him, kill him even, but now all I have left to do is cry. I am weak. I have nothing on him. I am just some dumb girl who is completely defenseless.

The faces of the players that had just tasted defeat under the hands of this man and his army came into mind. I became one of them; completely defeated and hopeless.

"Let me go." I whimpered. I had to leave. Staying there would only make things worse. I just wanted to go home.

"What's the magic word?" He teased.

"Please. Just please let me go." And he did. I wiped my tears and walked away. Head hung low, in utter defeat.

~x~

"I'm home!" I called out as I walked into the house, taking off my shoes immediately. A bunch of different smells caught my attention and lead me over to the kitchen where I saw my grandma cooking away at the stove.

"Obaasan, watcha cooking?" I asked, leaning on frame of the kitchen entrance.

"Oh, welcome home Chouko," She smiled warmly at me, "I am making a beef stew with some rice. Your Ojiisan isn't feeling so well, so I thought it best to make something hearty."

"Oh jeez, is he in his room?"

"Yes, your brother is up their with him. I think they are watching basketball."

"Go figure." I rolled my eyes and my grandmother chuckled softly. "Alright, well I gotta go get some work done, call me when foods ready!" I called, making my way up the stairs to my room.

I locked the door behind me, not bothering to even turn on the lights, and slid down to the floor with my back against the door.

"Dammit." I mumbled to myself, wrapping my arms around my knees and pulling them closer to my chest. The tears I was hiding from my grandmother found their way to my cheeks once again.

I remember sitting on floor in silence for what seemed like an eternity. The only sound to be heard was the occasional sniffle. The events of the day kept playing over and over in my head.

I was a train wreck on the way home. The walk to the bus stop, the bus ride, and the rest of the way home were just me trying to hold back my emotions but failing horribly. My friends had tried contacting me the whole way back trying to figure out what happened and at some point I just muted my phone. Now I am here and I don't know what to do.

I hated this. I hated that innocent people were suffering because of him. I hated that my brother had to endure what he did because of him. And most of all, I hated that I couldn't do anything about it. I was so useless, but then again, I always have been. Since I was a kid, I never stood up for myself. I always let people pick on me until some one else came in and helped me. All I could do was cry, and that hasn't changed a bit.

There I was, I could have said something, I could have done something to stop him, stop the way that he played.

 _I still can._

It was like another voice in the back of my head had spoken. It was 's not like that was the last time I would ever see Hanamiya. I could still do something, I had no idea what, but it wasn't the end. I could still fight, even if it was practically hopeless.


	6. Chapter Five

Chapter Five

The next day after that incident with Hanamiya I found myself standing in front of the gym, trying desperately to convince myself _not_ to walk in there and cause a scene, but I had decided that I would try and do something about this whole situation so any rational thoughts were being ignored. I pulled the door open and took a step into the gym sealing my fate.

"Hanamiya Makoto!" I called out, using the adrenaline that was coursing through me for empowerment. I must have yelled much louder than I anticipated because all of the players came to a stand still and the entire gym went quiet.

The captain stopped right before taking a shot and turned to look at me, amusement written across his face, "Oh, Butterfly-chan, how nice of you to pay a visit! I was starting to miss seeing that crying face of yours."

"I didn't come to cry this time." I tried to keep confidant and head strong, pretending that him calling me "Butterfly-chan" didn't faze me.

"Oh? I didn't know you were capable of anything else." He retorted back.

I took a deep breath, ignoring his rude comment, "I came to make a proposal." He lifted his gross eyebrows in surprise.

"Really now? This should be interesting."

"I want you to stop playing dirty on the court." I looked him dead in the eye for the first time since we noticed each other during his game.

There was a silence in the air as he tried to read whether or not I was being serious, but after he concluded that this was much too ridiculous to be a joke, he broke out into hysteric laughter with the rest of his team joining him.

"This little girl isn't joking. Oh my God, and I thought she was stupid before. She really must be out of her mind." I watched the group of boys laugh at me. I bit my lip in nervousness and considered just walking out of the gym after what seemed like hours of mockery, but concluded that, that would defeat the whole point of me being here up till now.

"I am not out of my mind. Stop being a complete scumbag on the court."

"Now, now, no need to throw around insults. That is no way to treat some one who you are trying to make a proposal with." He shook his head, "You'd make a terrible business woman."

"I am being serious Hanamiya."

"And so am I, but I don't see how I would benefit at all by doing that." He took steps closer to me, until we were at practically the same distance as we were yesterday, "What are you willing to give me in exchange?"

I looked up at him. _What was I willing to give up?_ I had thought at the time that he would just tell me what he wanted me to do when I brought this up to him. That he would just say, _'Do my homework for the rest of the year'_ , or something stupid like that. Oh, how naïve I was at the time. My total obliviousness to the true sadist in this man lead me to respond back with a little more confidence than I should have, "Anything."

Surprise took over his cocky expression for only a moment before going back to its usual state. That was the second time that I managed to get that reaction out of him today.

"Butterfly-chan, Butterfly-chan. You should be more careful of what you say to me," He leaned down and put his face up to mine, our lips brushed against each other as he spoke, "I won't let you back out of this now."

I felt a newfound nervousness take over me. The vibe he was letting off was completely different than it was just minutes ago. It was almost as if a dark purple radiation came off of him leaving me quivering below. I ended up giving in and retreating, taking a step back from him and lowering my head.

"You're so stupid it _almost_ takes away the fun of ruining you." The boy turned away from me and picked up a stray basketball that was lying on the court, walking over to one of the baskets, "Meet me in the locker room an hour before our game tomorrow. Don't be late or I'll make you regret it."

The sudden change in atmosphere left me puzzled and I blinked in confusion before registering what he said. Once I processed it, I nodded and said okay in agreement before heading for the exit.

As the doors began to close behind me, I heard Hanamiya call out, "Be sure to at least try and look cute, Baka," followed by the sound of a ball swooshing through the net and hitting the gym floor..


	7. Chapter Six

Chapter Six

The boy's locker room is a very disgusting place to say the least. The smell of fermenting boy sweat covered up by the suffocating cloud of Axe body spray that attacked me the moment I opened the door made me recoil before holding my breath and stepping in. I looked around for Hanamiya, but the only things inside this small room were the rusty lockers, discarded gym socks, a vandalized bench, and a cracked mirror.

Not knowing what I should do, I turned for the door to head out of our designated meeting spot. There was no way I was going to sit in this room longer than I had to. As I was about to grasp for the door handle, the door swung open revealing the very person I was looking for.

"Sorry for making you wait." The sarcasm rolled off his tongue as he stepped in practically pushing me aside.

"This place is totally gross. Aren't you guys supposed to at least try and keep it clean in here?" I looked around the room again, still peeved over how disgusting it actually was.

When I looked back over at Hanamiya he was siting on the bench, leaning back on his hands, his head resting on his shoulder and he was looking straight at me, smirk and all.

"What?"

"Did you put extra effort to look nice for me today?" His amused expression made me feel extremely self-conscious at that moment.

"Well yeah, I didn't know what you would have me doing, so I figured that maybe I would be doing something formal. I didn't want to make a fool of myself by being underdressed." My answer immediately sent him into a laughing fit.

"You really are a total idiot!" He managed to say between breaths.

"It's not like I went all out. I am just wearing a skirt and some mascara." I tried justifying.

"I wish that was the only thing that you were wearing." He teased. And before I knew it I found myself walking up to him, palm out and ready to leave a big ol' handprint on his otherwise perfect skin, but before I could make any contact he grabbed onto my wrist twisting it back. I gasped in pain and contorted my body to try and alleviate myself from the discomfort that the position he had me was inflicting.

"How about you come and sit over here?" He looked at me invitingly, almost as if he wasn't two seconds from snapping my arm in half. I obliged and he released me from his grasp so that I could move over to the bench. I sat down next to him, but tried to keep a bit of space between us. Why? Because I hated him with every fiber of my being and his very presence seemed to repel me away from him, that's why.

"I won't bite." He smirked in response to my obvious body language. I glared back at him and held my ground.

"So what is it that you are going to have me do, huh? I'd rather just get it over with and leave." At this point I was more or less disinterested in the whole thing. I really just wanted to do whatever it took to get this kid to stop what he was doing and move on with my life. I figured that he just abused players cause he wanted an advantage on the court and if I did something for him, like do all his homework, he would have more time to practice actually playing basketball.

What I hadn't understood at the time is the real reason he did what he did. What the true meaning was behind all of the abuse, physical and mental, that he put people through. I didn't know who Hanamiya Makoto really was, but it was in this locker room that I started to put together the pieces.

"It is simple. If I can't let my frustration out on the players during the games, I am just going to have to let it out on you, before the games, instead."

"Dude, I am not just going to let you beat me up. You try and fight me and I will fight back."

"Baka, That's not what I meant, although you probably will leave with some bruises." I looked back at him puzzled, trying to figure out what he could have possibly been trying to say. Looking back, and you probably would agree, I really was stupid. It was so obvious now what he was trying to get at, but I couldn't even begin to imagine that what he was thinking of doing at the time.

"Then what do you mean?"

"Do I really need to spell it out for you?" And when I stared back at him, clearly clueless, he slid across the bench until he was uncomfortably close to me, locking eyes with me, "Let me _fuck_ you Kiyoshi Chouko."

The way he spoke to me was enough to drain all of the blood from my body, let alone what he said. His words snaked out of his mouth and filled the room with venom that bit at my skin with every syllable. I tried to come back with some snarky comment but I seemed to forget all language and all I could do was stare at him in shock.

After what seemed like forever I managed to squeak out a pathetic, "You can't be serious," before falling back into my lost state.

I was so focused on his mouth, scared of what he might have said next that I was totally taken back when he touched his hand against my thigh. Despite this being one of the only times this boy would ever touch me softly, I jerked away immediately. It was as if his fingertips electrocuted me.

His cocky smirk seemed to dissipate into annoyance as I snapped out of my dazed state and began yelling at him. "You pervert! I thought you were joking before. I can't believe you were being serious! What is wrong with you? I would never even think about doing something as disgusting as that!"

I headed to the door, having enough with the conversation. But right before I rushed out Hanamiya mentioned, just loud enough so that I could hear, "You know, I am going to be playing your brother again this year." I stopped dead in my tracks; "It would be such a shame if right after he got back on his two feet he ends up in the hospital again."

"You wouldn't." I shot back turning around to face him.

"Oh you know I would."

"He already has to stop playing basketball because of you. Isn't that enough?"

"Do you think I really care about that?" He scoffed, "Right now all I can think of is the agonizing cry of pain he made that day, and how much better it would sound when I ensure that he will never be able to walk again."

The anger that bubbled in me caused my body to physically shake. I stomped up to him and grabbed him by the collar looking his dead in the eyes, "That's sick, even for you, Hanamiya."

"You have no idea sweetheart." He made no attempt to free himself from my grasp, but he didn't even need to; I couldn't be this close to him. That repulsive energy that seemed to ooze out of his pores began to burn my skin forcing me to let go and take a step back.

"I am so sick of your shit."

"My next game is next week, it's an away game, but I will meet you before that back in here. If you don't show up I will take that as a 'no' to our deal. I warn you I will be angry and I promise I will let all of that anger on the players. So choose wisely."

"Yeah whatever." I headed toward the exit, "I hope you lose your game today."

"Oh I assure you, I won't."


	8. Chapter Seven

Chapter Seven

 _Freak Magnet_ , I read the first sentence of that book at least a hundred times within the two hours I spent in the library, but I do not remember a word of it.

It was three days after the Hanamiya incident and I was trying my hardest to forget everything and dive into the fictional tellings of an easily digestible rom-com, but no matter how hard I tried to get into it my brain would march right back into the war it was having with itself: Whether or not to take up the deal.

Did I want to have sex with Hanamiya? Hell no. His ugly eyebrows, heavy dark eye circles, anemic looking body, and long greasy hair, were anything but a turn on. Not to mention his god awful personality, but could I stand letting more players get hurt when I knew that I could do something to stop it? Especially, when all it takes is to have sex, one time, with some virgin high school boy. But sex does mean something, right? That's what everyone says, anyways.

I kept running around in circles with these ideas, not noticing the dead eyes that were staring at me, waiting for a response. That is until the figure physically took the book out of my hands, "Are you paying any attention to me? The library is closing."

I snapped out of my thoughts and looked up at the tall boy that was looking down at me, "Oh, sorry. I was kind of zoned out." I quickly started to get my things together to leave, hoping to make up for any time the kid must have spent waiting on me.

"It's sad. " He stated emotionless, dragging my attention back to him.

"What's sad? The book? I thought it was supposed to be more of a romantic comedy based on it's description but –"

"I didn't mean the book. I meant the situation you are in. It's sad. The more you struggle to deal with it, the farther away from an answer you become."

Who was this kid? How did he know I was struggling with something? Why was he even talking to me? At the time, I had no idea and all his comment did was piss me off. I grabbed my now full bag and stormed off leaving him and his dead fish like expression behind.

~x~

The entire ride home my thoughts volleyballed between the proposal and the new experience in the library. It was like the whole world around me was getting so weird and I was getting so frustrated. If only I hadn't dragged myself into this mess.

When I got home that day I didn't even bother trying to contain my frustration. I rushed past my family, who I didn't even notice was there, and stormed up the stairs to my room. When my privacy was assured by the sound of the closing door I threw my bag onto the ground and gave the wall next to me a good punch. Tears began to fall down my face, partially due to the pain and partially due to my anger, and I let myself fall to the ground.

No matter what choice I made Hanamiya would win. I couldn't stand to think about my obvious failure but that sense of loss consumed me, so much so that I didn't even notice the knocking at my door.

"Chouko? Common open the door." My brother's voice snapped me out of my thoughts and I looked over at where his voice was coming from.

Without a word I got up and opened the door and walked over to my bed, finding a comfortable spot to sit in.

"What's wrong?" The concern in his voice hit me and guilt instantly washed over. I knew I couldn't tell him what was going on, but I knew he was worried about me.

"I can't tell you. It's a personal thing." I looked away from the boy who was now sitting next to me.

"Is it a boy? A girl maybe?"

"No, I wish it was that simple." I scoffed.

"Love isn't as simple as it may seem."

"Just because the girl you like has a crush on your captain and has you deep in the friend zone, doesn't mean love is complicated. It means you're undesirable." I shot back.

"Ouch, you don't need to be so harsh about it." He said playfully, as if I didn't just shoot him down, "And when did this become about me? You are the one sitting here crying."

When I didn't respond he sighed and pushed my hair behind my ear and wiped the tears from my face, "Did some one say something mean to you? Do I have to go and beat someone up?"

"You wouldn't beat anyone up. You'd probably just kill them with kindness and then leave." I gave him a soft smile.

"Was it Hanamiya?" My smile instantly faded at the sound of his name. How was it that everyone knew my business? Teppei doesn't even go to the same school as me.

My reaction must have given something away because he followed back with, "It was him, wasn't it?"

"No, I don't even really know him. Isn't he the head of the disciplinary committee or something? Why would he say something to me?" I tried playing it off, but I doubt that this was by any means a believable performance.

"Common, Chouko. What did he say?" His face got really serious and for a moment I wanted to spill everything to him. Tell him about every single thing that was going on, but I knew better than that.

"He didn't say anything. Really."

"If you tell me I can make it stop, but I can't do anything if–"

"Who said I wanted you to do anything, huh? Just go and mind your own freaking business. No one asked you to help me." I snapped.

Teppei just sat there, his expression blank.

My brother was the kind of person who's self worth came from helping those who need it. His purpose was to make the people he loved feel protected. His happiness sprouted from the smiles of others. Without that, he was nothing. Empty. So, me saying what I had hurt him more than any basketball injury, but at that moment I didn't seem to really care.

After a moment, he put himself back together and stood up from my bed, "I see you are growing up now. You are right. You need to start fighting your own battles. Just do what you want and what makes you happy because I don't think I can stand seeing you cry like this." He turned and gave me a pained smile before walking out of my room, leaving me alone to my thoughts, once again.

~x~

After a couple hours of mentally running around in circles, I figured it would be best to go and apologize to my brother. I had been a total jerk to him and he was just trying to help. Plus, the sad look on his face when he left my room made me feel super crappy.

I knocked on his bedroom door and waited for him to come and open it. When the door opened and revealed my face to him, he looked back at me with surprise before letting me into his room. He went and sat back at his desk chair and I stood by the door, not expecting this interaction to take a long time.

"Look, I am sorry for being a pain in the ass, I know you weren't trying to be overbearing. It's just that schools been much more stressful than I thought it was going to be. I have been staying after school and stuff, but it feels like I'm not getting any better. It really wasn't that Hanamiya person." I lied, but I also apologized, so it balanced itself out. I just couldn't let my brother know about Hanamiya.

I have no idea if he actually believed me, but he did go along with it, "Is that why you've been coming home so late recently?"

"Yeah."

"Don't over work yourself. At the end of the day your mental health comes first."

"I know. I know. I just don't wanna let anyone down." I slid down the door and sat on the floor.

"Don't worry about that. If you try your hardest people will still be proud of you, no matter what the grade."

"I guess." I pouted and Teppei smiled back at me.

"Common," he stood up from his chair, "Let's go and have dinner. Grandma and Grandpa already ate, but I figured I would wait for you to eat so you wouldn't be alone." He reached out to me with his huge hands to help me up.

I accepted his gesture and got up, "What's on the menu?"

"Something delicious." He grinned.

"Are you trying to keep it a surprise? Cause need I remind you that you suck at surprises?"

"Nope, I genuinely have no idea." I laughed and we went down stairs to enjoy a delicious meal.

It was sometime while we sat at the dinner table that I decided to listen to what my brother had said and put my happiness first.


	9. Chapter Eight

Chapter Eight

All through out the day, it seemed as if people were talking about Kirisaki's game later. Despite Hanamiya giving me no details, I knew where it was going to be, what time it was going to be, who was going to the game, and how every one was going to get there. These were all details that didn't matter since I wasn't going to go, but that didn't stop people from informing me whenever they got the chance.

The final school bell had rung and I considered staying late in the library again, but I knew that until the day was over I wasn't going to get much reading done. Plus, I didn't want to risk running into that creepy guy again, so I decided against that idea and just followed the rest of the students out of the school.

~x~

I was sitting on the train, watching familiar sights go by as I made my commute back home. Usually I would be in a rush to get off the train. I'd count down the stops until mine came along, trying to find something to do to make the ride less terrible, but today I found myself dreading my stop. A sense of guilt plagued me. I understood that going to the game today wouldn't be what my brother wanted for me, it's not what I want for myself, but I can't help but feel like I was betraying, not only him, but every team that would eventually play against Kirisaki Daiichi.

I had the ability to stop this madness, but I was putting myself first.

As we got closer and closer to my stop the feeling grew and grew until it got to the point where the very idea of facing my family made me sick. My stop was announced over the speakers, but my body didn't listen to my brain's messages to get up. I was stuck to my seat and before I could break loose, the doors to the train closed.

~x~

"Welcome to McDonald's. How may I help you?"

"Can I get a large fry and a medium coke?"

"Sure, you're total is $3.89."

I ended up getting off at the next stop and wandering into a McDonalds that was a couple blocks away from the station. I was hungry and needed a way to pass time so what better way than to eat some garbage? Aren't there chemicals in fast food products that are supposed to be comforting? Isn't that why some people get addicted to this crap?

I paid the lady at the counter in exchange for my food and made my way to a table that was in the far back of the restaurant, hoping no one would sit by me. As I munched away, I noticed two boys walk in, one of them in their basketball team's sweats. As they proceeded to order, I tried to remember why it was that their teams name seemed so familiar. I never really paid attention much to basketball despite my family being so into it. Well, more specifically, my brother and my grandfather.

From what I have been told, Oniisan used to be really good at the sport when he was younger, but for as long as I remember him he always seemed too frail to be doing any physical activity. Now he just sits in his room and watches old games that he recorded on VHS tapes from when he was in his youth, longing to go back to that time when he could run around on the court. Teppei will often join him, even though I am convinced he really isn't that interested, especially after having seen the same few games so many times.

"Yo, dude I heard you guys are playing Kiri Dai today. You better watch out." The sound of my schools name brought my attention back to the real world. The two boys who had been ordering were now sitting a couple seats over from me, just an earshot away.

"Yeah, I know. After what they did to Hayato last year I am surprised they are even still allowed to play."

"Seriously, that's some messed up shit. Speaking of Hayato, is he still playing ball?"

"Nah, the tendons in his arm are all fucked up. I think he joined the cycling club or something. We aren't really close anymore so I'm not totally sure." I tensed as I thought about the other player, what he must have gone through.

"Damn. Just watch your ass okay? You are one of the best on the team now, you're the perfect target for those freaks."

'If you don't show up I will take that as a 'no' to our deal. I warn you I will be angry and I promise I will let all of that anger on the players. So choose wisely.' Hanamiya's words echoed in my mind and I stared at the boy in the sweats. He was fairly tall, quite built; he looked like a pretty good athlete to me, not that I knew very much about the subject. He just felt like a strong, like a true athlete.

An angry Hanamiya would love to rip that title away from him.

The boys continued on talking about some other things that seemed completely unimportant to me now. I was reevaluating my decision to leave things the way they were. I think I owed this boy at least that. We may have been strangers, but his fate was in my hands and I don't think I could have lived with myself if I had just ignored that fact.

Before I knew it the two boys got up from the table they were sitting at and walked out of the restaurant, not knowing the impact that their conversation had on the outcome of my day.

~x~

" You're late." Hanamiya had sounded mildly more irritated than normal, but the way his brows bunched together and the fact that a frown had taken the place of the usual smirk he wore when talking to me, I new that this was more than mild irritation.

"How am I late? You didn't even give me a time. Actually, you didn't give me any details about today."

"Did I say you could talk back to me?"

"No but-"

"Shut up." I immediately retreated back. The booming sound of his voice echoed within the small locker room and made me feel as if he was surrounding me. He was in front of me and behind me; he was hiding in the back of the locker room and yelling in my ear; all while sitting on the bench of the much more sanitary locker room.

"I'm sorry," I whimpered.

Despite being in foreign territory, Hanamiya already made himself the ruler. He owned the space, even if only until today's game's conclusion. "No, I am sorry. I shouldn't have yelled. Come here." He held his arms out inviting me over to him. His outward appearance as "welcoming" as it could be, his apology equally "genuine", but this is Hanamiya we are speaking of. "Welcoming" and "genuine" were only faces that he put on to get what they wanted; they weren't things that actually belonged to him. He just saw other people use them and took them for himself.

I didn't trust him, but I had no choice but to enter his embrace. I made the choice to come here, I knew what was going to happen, I had no right to be hesitant.

I stood over him and he hugged me around my hips, resting his head against me. My natural reaction was to place my hands on his head, to tangle my fingers into his hair, to look down at him with a soft smile on my face. That was not what I did, that was not the kind of relationship we had. I was here on business, strictly business. "Common, we both know this isn't some lovey dovey scenario. Can we just get this over with?"

He looked back up at me, his grin back on his face, "Can't wait to get started I see," He stood up, dragging his hands up my body until he got to my hair, which he tugged on, pulling my head back so that I was now the one looking up at him, "Some slut you are." I flinched at his word choice.

"You're the one who-" He pulled my hair harder making me cry out in pain.

"What did I say about talking back?" This time I didn't apologize, but just closed my eyes. "Don't act like some victim here. I'm not doing anything you didn't consent to doing." I wanted to continue fighting back, but he was right. I am not a victim. I have a choice; I can leave at any moment. I just need to do what he says for now. It'll be quick.

"You're right." I muttered and opened my eyes. He was looking down on me, thirst in his eyes.

"I know. Now, kneel down for me." I obeyed, getting on my knees in front of him. "You look so cute down there like that." I felt my cheeks burn up at what he was saying and got even more flush when he pat my head gently, like I was some kind of pet. I glared up at him and he smacked me. "I complimented you, why are you looking at me like that? Baka."

I hadn't even noticed the insult when he had said it, because of the way he was tracing patterns into my skin with his fingertips, starting with my lips and tracing every inch of my face, making it a point to put emphasis on the freshly reddened skin, until he ended up back where he started. "Your home was on your way here. Why didn't you stop and get changed out of your uniform?"

His harsh voice was enough to snap me out of the trance, "How do you know where I –"

"Holy fuck. What is with you? Just answer the question."

Pause. "I had no intentions of actually showing up here."

He raised one of his brows and scoffed, "What changed your mind?"

"I ran into a player that is on the team you are going to play today. You injured one of their players last year and now he can't even play basket ball anymore." Upon completing my sentence I noticed that Hanamiya had a sick look of satisfaction and possibly even ecstasy on his face.

"Are you trying to turn me on?"

I looked at him, dumbfounded and disgusted by what he just said. All this, is just away for him to get off? He did what he did to my family just so that he could blow a load when he got home? All the suffering, all the night's spent at the hospital. I tried to contain my anger, it would get me nowhere now.

"You really are a sicko."

"A sicko that is about to fuck the shit out of you." He licked his bottom lip and smirked, "Common take your uniform off." I stared at him for a moment, debating walking out of there and telling him to go fuck himself. But I couldn't; so instead, I began unbuttoning my shirt as quick as I could to avoid being yelled at.

I hadn't noticed how much I was shaking until I was ordered to hurry up. I looked up at Hanamiya who was just watching me with his arms crossed over his chest. The feeling of his judgment over me made me even more nervous, but I eventually finished unbuttoning the shirt, moving to my skirt, and eventually began taking off my shoes.

"No. Keep your shoes on." I looked up confused and Hanamiya rolled his eyes, "Common, continue. You still have underwear on, don't you?"

I let go of my shoe, keeping it on my foot and began unhooking my bra, fumbling a bit, but getting it off. I looked up to see if I could read any expression on the boys face, but nothing. I looked back down. All that I had left on so far were my panties, knee high socks, and shoes. I knew that I still had one more thing to take off, but when I went to remove them I hesitated and looked back up, praying for mercy with my eyes, but nothing.

"Can we turn a light off or something?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"That defeats the purpose."

"What purpose?"

"Just take off your fucking embarrassing ass Disney panties. I don't have all day. The boys are gonna be here in an hour and I don't think you want my whole team seeing you like this." I looked back down at my underwear and saw Olaf smiling at me. I hadn't been planning on coming here, so I didn't put any thought into the underwear that I would be wearing, but jeez of all the things I could have chosen, it had to be these.

Without much hesitation this time (nudity would be equally embarrassing as my choice of undergarments at this point) I pulled my underwear down and stepped out of it, leaving the snowman discarded on the floor.

Hanamiya was still looking at me, giving me no expression to read. His eyes just analyzing ever inch of my body. This had to be the most unnerving thing I had ever experienced. I stepped back and forth, switching the weight of my body from one foot to another, rubbing my hands together, and doing my best to cover my body up without being too obvious about it.

"Turn around," still nothing to read from him.

I listened slowly turning around in a full circle. When I ended up facing him again he was smirking once more. Was that a good thing? I mean, I didn't care that much about what he thought about me, but I couldn't help but hope that he found me at least somewhat attractive. He was the first boy who had seen me like this.

He began to step toward me again, this time not forcing me on my knees in front of him, instead he grabbed me by the back of the neck and whispered into my ear, "I read somewhere that people feel more exposed when they are wearing only their shoes, as opposed to when they are completely naked. Would you agree with that?"

He finished his dialogue by biting into the flesh right bellow my ear, as if pressing the punctuation into my flesh. I opened my mouth to respond, but it all came out breathy, "I think I'd feel pretty exposed either way."

Hanamiya didn't respond to me with words, rather, he just continued biting and licking the skin on my neck. More frequently than not the bites hurt, but occasionally he would hit a sensitive spot and I could feel my body melt. I'm pretty sure that just satisfied him more than I wanted it to, because he got more and more into it, using his other hand to fondle my breast.

I gasped at the sudden touch. I am not going to lie and say that I had never done this to myself, but when I had I was always gentle. This was anything but gentle. He dug his nails into the soft flesh and my eyes tightened at the pain. His mouth made its way down to the other side and he began leaving marks that were a deeper shade of purple-red than the ones that were made in more exposed areas.

I grabbed onto his hair for support and he responded by tugging on my nipples, one with his finger tips and the other between his teeth, all I could do was pull harder and cry out.

"That noise, make it again." The man snarled, before pulling at me again, slightly harder this time. I didn't want to obey his command, but the pain was too much, I let out another cry. "Fuck, that's hot."

I felt strong arms wraps around me and my feet no longer touched the ground. I opened my eyes just slightly and saw that he was now carrying me, but they quickly shut again when I felt my back slam against the row of lockers. I gasped and Hanamiya must have seen that as an opening cause I now had his tongue in my mouth. It was gross, which might seem like an odd thing to say now seeing all that has already happened, but if you have ever have kissed someone who has used too much tongue you would understand my distaste.

I tried getting him off of me, using my palms to push at his chest. He just forced himself closer to me, and used one of his hands to grab my wrists, putting an end to my fight.

He eventually pulled away for air, a string of saliva still connecting our lips together. I opened my eyes and he was staring straight at me, his lust easily read on his face, "Back on your knees," was all he said before letting go of me, dropping me to the floor.

I gathered myself and fumbled to get back onto my knees after hitting the ground. It didn't hurt that much at the time, but I ended up with a huge bruise on my butt afterword. As I got myself into position, Hanamiya began undoing his pants and pulling them down, exposing himself.

I turned away at the sight, a blush creeping on my face, but I was immediately jerked back around, nails digging into the side of my face.

"Come on, Butterfly-Chan. Suck it."

I looked up at his face in shock, making a conscious effort to not look at the boner that was right at my eye level. I knew that we'd be having sex, and yes, I knew there would probably be foreplay; however, the very thought of doing something so degrading made me almost walk out the door.

"Common, you selfish slut, for once do something to help someone out instead of always thinking about yourself." He let go of my chin and waited for me to make a move. He knew I would. He wouldn't have to force it. He pressed my buttons emotionally and it made me move. I wasn't a slut, but I was selfish. I never did anything for anyone, but people were always doing things for me. This was my chance for redemption. I opened my mouth and lowered it on his member. A groan escaped Hanamiya's lips and he gripped onto the hair on the back of my head.

It burned and hurt. I couldn't really think about anything other than the discomfort. What do people usually think about when doing this? Pleasuring the other person, perhaps? But I didn't want to pleasure him, so I didn't think of anything, just the pain. The pain in my throat from forcing a foreign object down it, the pain in my lungs from pleading for oxygen, the pain on my scalp from the hair pulling, and the pain on my knees from putting my weight on them for too long.

I was in control of the situation for hardly a moment, because he just pounded himself into my mouth. At the time I thought it was because I was doing a bad job, but I now know that Hanamiya doesn't like blow jobs, he likes face fucks. They are different. They hurt far worse.

I began slapping his leg, a call for mercy as my body threated to let my gag reflex take control. Tears were pouring down my face, my mascara running and my hair a knot from where he held onto me for leverage. He just ignored it, running his free hand through his hair.

Right as I felt a new acidic feeling start forcing its way up my throat, he let go throwing me backwards making me fall onto the floor. Finally having exposure to air, I coughed and wheezed.

Before I could completely satisfy my lung's craving, Hanamiya's face was right up in mine. He watched the effects of what he had done to me. It was hard to really see him while coughing, but I noticed it. The look on his face, the way the atmosphere changed. He couldn't wait any longer. He was a predator ready to attack.

He flipped me over and pushed my face into the ground, lifting my waist up, getting me into position. I tried to calm myself down, brace myself for what was to come. I didn't bother trying to say anything because I knew that the man that was in the room with me right now, using me as his toy, wouldn't hear a word that came out of my mouth.

I felt my legs part, exposing me to new sense of humility. It was an extreme level of exposure that only escalated when I felt him stick a digit into me. My face was against the ground and out of Hanamiya's view, but I know he knew exactly what expression washed over me. I can assume it was very lewd.

After pumping in and out of me nowhere near enough times, he decided that was good enough and began rubbing his thickness in between my folds.

Right before Hanamiya pushed himself into me he stopped, "I just fucking thought of something. You are a virgin right?" I blushed. Was it that obvious? Did he have some weird fetish for virgins? He seemed like the type that would get off at that kind of thing. I definitely did not want to give him that satisfaction, so I lied.

"No I'm not actually."

"Oh, really?"

"Yes really," I tried sounding confident, "I had a boy friend for a while, but we recently broke up." I started to get impatient, not that I particularly wanted to have sex with him, it's just that this position was starting to get uncomfortable and my body couldn't take it anymore. I just wanted to get it over with.

"Alright, that's fine by me. That just means that I don't have to be gentle with you, which I was dreading having to do anyways, so thank you for being such a slut, Butterfly-chan."

Before I could protest, or even process what he said for that matter, he gripped my hips and thrust himself in me with one swift forceful motion. I cried out and bit my lip trying to contain the pain that I was now feeling between my legs.

As he slammed his body into me, I felt tears start to fall down my face. I don't know when I had started crying or why exactly it was that I was crying. Was it the pain of having him ram himself into me with no consideration of the pain I was going through or the shame of giving my virginity away to some freak that I couldn't stand? Probably a combination of the two. I had thought that I was ready, but there wasn't any way to prepare for this.

I gasped.

The hands that were just on my hips were now hitting me. A mixture of spanks, slaps, and occasional punches. He was covering my back and my sides with bruises. Anywhere he could turn my skin purple he did. The room filled with the sound of skin making contact with each other, from the sex and the hits. Occasional groans and many insults were let out from him. I just sobbed, wanting to beg him to stop, but the words wouldn't come out.

It seemed like time was going by so slowly and with each movement the pain seemed to grow until I felt him pull out of me. Streaks of warm liquid began to cover my bruised back and I felt my body relax knowing that the brutal pounding was over.

After a couple minutes of his deep breathing and me trying to swallow my tears, Hanamiya was the first to speak, no sign of him just finishing intercourse in his voice, "I thought you said you had sex before."

"I- I did." My voice cracked, still in shock from the pain. I couldn't admit now that I lied, not while I was like this.

"I know you're lying. Why keep denying it?" He placed on finger inside of me, for just a moment and I jumped, not expecting him to touch there again.

"I'm not lying."

"Non-virgins don't bleed when you fuck them." He moved the finger that was just inside of me into my field of vision. It was slick with blood.

I groaned at the sight, my face pressed against the hard surface, and my butt still in the air. Hanamiya began laughing which just increased my humiliation. There was something about his laughter that was always so condescending.

"I knew you were stupid, I mean you are a Kiyoshi, but this is too much. Yamazaki probably has a higher IQ. Why would you even lie about that, Baka?"

I fidgeted, debating whether or not to tell him the truth. I did. "I thought you had some sort of weird fetish or something." I mumbled, but he still managed to hear.

"I suppose you could say I do have "weird fetishes", but that's not why I wanted to know. I wanted to know so I could determine how hard I could go." He backed away from me and slapped my already sore ass really hard, "Now you gotta clean all this shit up."

I attempted to sit up to assess the damage but a sharp pain shot up my body, causing me to wince and go back to the position I was in. Hanamiya laughed again.

"You're such a jerk face," was all I could come up with.

"And you're a fucking idiot, now seriously, clean this shit up." He began putting his clothing back on.

"I can't even stand sit down! How do you expect me to clean?" I yelled, still naked and in a demeaning position, make up smeared across my face from the crying.

"And whose fault is that?"

"Be real for a minute, Hanamiya. You wouldn't have gone slow even if you knew I was a virgin. Hell you probably would have gone harder. And aren't you supposed to ease into a girl, virgin or not?"

"I did know you were a virgin. Do you really think I believed your bullshit, Olaf?" I remembered my underwear choice. My face flushed red. "I just wanted to punish you for lying to me." He walked up to me and lifted my head up by my chin, "Do you think you learned your lesson?"

I averted my gaze from his and gave him the response I thought he wanted, "Yes."

His face twisted and he threw my face away from him as if the very sight of it repulsed him, "We have to work on that. Next game is a home game. Show up two hours before… We have to work on you."

I turned my head to face him, horror plastered on my face, "What do you mean next time?"

"Frustration builds up, did you really think this was a one time thing? Especially with the way this whole thing went, you're lucky I'm not gonna beat the fuck out of this next team."

Wait. I have to do this every time he has a game?

"Now seriously, get off your ass, my team is going to be here and this mess is worse than your choice in undergarments."


	10. Chapter Nine

No one noticed a thing when I got home. Hanamiya was smart enough to only leave marks in places I could cover up easily. That being said he completely mutilated every other part of my body and if my shirt rode up, even just a centimeter, every one would be able to see the purple tinted patches.

My make up and hair was all messed up too, but I had an entire train ride to clean myself up so by the time I walked into my house again it was like nothing even happened.

~x~

Outside of the Hanamiya visits, life continued on as normal from then on out. I still woke up every morning, took a shower, got dressed, ate breakfast, went to school, spent some time in the library, talked to my friends, went home, ate dinner, hung out with my family, and went to bed. I still loved ice cream, watched romantic comedies, dreamt of marrying Leonardo DeCaprio, and wanted to become an author. But none of that meant that I was still the same person.

I had changed, but nothing around me did. It was like I was living someone else's life. My body felt as though it was on autopilot. It just did the things that it was supposed to do, the things that it always did, without me putting much thought into it. Actually, I would even go as far as saying I didn't really think at all. Everything was just static. My conscious on the other hand, _it screamed._

When I laughed at my friend's jokes it screamed, when I sat at the dinner table it screamed, when I looked at my brother it screamed, but the time when it was the loudest was when I looked at myself in the mirror and saw my now deformed body. It screamed so loud I cried. I just cried.

When I am with Hanamiya my conscious shut's up. There is something about him that silences people's conscious. Even if I wanted it to speak, it couldn't. He just smothers it with the harsh touch of his skin on mine.

I wonder if he has learned to use that skill on himself?

"Get your ugly face out of my sight."

I flinch. His saliva hit's my face. I get up and gather my things. This was the 3rd time I helped relieve Hanamiya after the day that this all began. I already have begun to get the hang of things though. The rules are quite simple. Do what he says, when he says it, and don't say a word unless he says it's okay. Don't say anything when he ties you up so hard that your skin blisters, don't say anything when he writes degrading things all over your body in permanent marker, don't say anything when he get's bored of having sex with two of your holes so he takes it upon himself to use a third, don't say anything. Not to him, not to anyone.

I walk out of the room, not a single word is said.

~x~

"I'm home." I walk into the house and try to make it up the stairs and to the shower as quick as I can, hoping to avoid any communication before I wash Hanamiya off of me.

I make it just up the stairs before Teppei stops me, "Chouko we need to talk."

I begin panicking inside, but do my best to keep my cool. Just because he wants to talk doesn't mean it has anything to do with what I have been doing after school.

"Yeah, can you hold it until after I shower? I'm tired and trying to wind down, you know? It's been a stressful day." I try and push past him and toward the shower, but he grabs my wrist and pushes down my sleeve, revealing the raw skin that wrapped around my arm.

"What have you been doing after school?" He knew. Of course he knew. No one new me better than he did. The question is, how long did he know without saying anything to me? Did he know all along?

"Nothing." I tried pulling my arm away from his grasp but he gripped on tighter. I winced.

"Chouko, I am serious. Who is doing this to you?"

"Let go of me."

"Not until you tell me what's going on."

"Seriously Teppei, let go."

"You're my little sister. I can't just ignore this, it's my job to protect you."

"I _fucking_ said, let go of me!" I yelled, glaring up at my older brother. I watched his face transform from concern to shock to hurt. I never swore, especially not to him, "I never asked you to worry about me. Stop treating me like I'm some kind of chore."

We stared at each other for what seemed like forever, but he eventually let go of my burning wrist and retreated back into his room. He turned back to me before closing the door, "You've changed Chouko and I really don't like it. Don't think I am letting go of this so easily."

I rubbed my wrist and walked into the bathroom.

I normally would have been upset by what he said, would have felt guilty for what I said, but my conscious was screaming so loud and my mind was nothing but static.

 _~x~_

I decided to keep the encounter I had with my brother a secret from Hanamiya. I know that he would just get mad at me, and there was nothing he could do about it either way, so I didn't really see the point.

That night I had just taken a shower and gone to bed, skipping dinner entirely. I knew that would send even more red flags off in Teppei's head, but I didn't care. I couldn't stand the scent of food.

Going to school the next day was quite hard. My hips ached and it made it hard to walk, but I tied to cover it up the best I could.

I don't think that any of my friends, or anyone really, picked up what was going on. In school Hanamiya leaves me alone for the most part. When we do run into each other, however, he will not hesitate to comment on something that I am apparently doing wrong.

 _"I don't want you talking to him."_

 _"You're friends are so annoying. Tell them to shut the fuck up."_

 _"Don't eat so much. You're gonna get fat."_

 _"Did you roll up your skirt today? Don't think I didn't notice, slut."_

 _"Who are you trying to impress, wearing all that makeup?"_

At first I would try and yell back at him, but it got to the point of not even being worth it anymore. Now I just ignore his little comments. They are nothing compared to the other stuff he does, so it isn't too hard.

One time he pointed out that I never go and watch his games and that I should go to make sure he is keeping his end of the bargain. I simply told him that I would know if he was lying to me. When he tried to figure out more I just walked away.

Hanamiya is different when he abuses me instead of the other players. I didn't know at the time exactly what it was, but now I think it's just _his_ conscious.

Whether he realizes it or not, beating up basketball players, and raping a girl are too very different things. This may seem obvious to most people, and in reality should be obvious, especially to a genius, but he was never the type of person to differentiate things like that. In his head, he was just relieving his frustration out in a different way. Both ways ruined some one else's life and benefited his own, when you looked at it like that, they were the same. But, I think deep down he knew the difference; he just wasn't willing to admit it.

And I was never strong enough to point it out.

Even to this day.


End file.
